rabbivole:

ahahagerman:

made a small mistake on his German exam.

oh my god
i learned something today

This is how my Japanese class learned how to say “porn magazine” and the slang for “big titties”—the exchange professor couldn’t keep a straight face when someone fucked up.—porn magazine: pinku zasshi.  Discovered when going over descriptions, talking about a magazine with a large pink box on the background of the cover photo.—“big titties”: boing=/=byoin.  Because it’s unusual to run up to someone on the street and ask where the titties are whilst your friend lies bleeding in the street, in desperate need of the nearest hospital.

rabbivole:

ahahagerman:

made a small mistake on his German exam.

oh my god

i learned something today

This is how my Japanese class learned how to say “porn magazine” and the slang for “big titties”—the exchange professor couldn’t keep a straight face when someone fucked up.

—porn magazine: pinku zasshi. Discovered when going over descriptions, talking about a magazine with a large pink box on the background of the cover photo.

—“big titties”: boing=/=byoin. Because it’s unusual to run up to someone on the street and ask where the titties are whilst your friend lies bleeding in the street, in desperate need of the nearest hospital.

(via thingthatgoesbumpinthenight)

(Source: koolghoul, via spikesspiegel)

pasiphile:

frankysplait:

glowcloud:

i love the Women Against Feminism that are like “I dont need feminism because i can admit i need my husband to open a jar for me and thats ok!” cause listen 1. get a towel 2. get the towel damp 3. put it on the lid and twist. BAM now men are completely useless. you, too, can open a jar. time to get a divorce

image

SUE

(via mexi-q)

"What’s your best party trick, Sue Perkins?" (x)

(Source: gbbosmacked, via andyouremymission)

Anonymous said: how does one get into writing kindle erotica like i want to supplement my income plz help

spacetwinks:

y’all go to this website, sign up, fill out some tax crap

write about 5000 words of porn or more - 3000 or more also acceptable, but you don’t really want to go under that. don’t tab to indent, i swear to god, it fucks with amazon’s formatting so bad. don’t write any porn that’d send you to jail IRL, amazon naturally (and thank god) doesn’t accept that shit.

on the ‘bookshelf’ tab, you click ‘add new title’, fill out everything, upload a cover - you can get one free image a month (or maybe a week now, i dunno) from bigstock.com if you need some stock images of people’s abs and stuff but can’t put cash down for anything just yet - and amazon has a cover making application built right into the process too to make things easier or if you don’t know shit about photoshop or whatever.

then you upload the document itself. click save and continue. choose how much you want your title to cost - 2.99 is generally what most people price theirs at, because that’s where amazon’s 70 percent royalties starts at. enroll in kindle select if you want that 70 percent royalties to apply to the whole world, so you’re getting the same royalties no matter where you sell.

then you hit publish and wait and wait and wait and wait for amazon to actually publish the fucking thing.

then you wait 60 days after the end of the month to get your royalties! don’t know why, but that’s how amazon rolls.

and you just keep making more and more titles in the meanwhile to build up that income cuz you’re not likely to make a lot from just one title.

there’s no real ‘gatekeepers’ in kindle erotica - you just start writing and publishing and you keep doing it and building up a library. some genres/kinks/niches sell better than others, and trends come and go, but it’s really all up to you - to do the writing, the publishing, the marketing, and then more writing and publishing. you just keep at it, bit by bit. this is a market where it’s really all about quantity… the bigger your library is, the more sales you’ll start to rack up, building like a snowball. even better if you release titles on like a regular schedule. ideally you want to put up like 2 titles a week, but 1 a week is a good initial goal to shoot for.

you can also go to amazon’s author central to set up an author page to get all your titles in one place and help build a reader base/link readers and buyers in general to.

godspeed anon!

slimydad:

aztec420:

FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how does something this small even exist? is this a pig molecule? i need to lay down a while

(Source: eviljovan, via crieffgriefs)

Early Bird Art Submissions Emails Sent Out

00qreversebang:

Dear artists,

I have sent out the early bird art submission emails. If you have not received your email, please do let me know via email (00qreversebang@gmail.com) or message this account.

For your reference, here is the email sent out:

———————————————————————————————————-

Greetings agents,

I hope that your missions are going well. This is your Quartermaster checking in on your mission progress. Apologies for the lack of communication lately, fighting cyber-terrorism can be so demanding when you’re the only competent person in Q Branch.
As usual, we will implement Protocol Rembrandt for this. For agents who have undoubtedly forgotten, Protocol Rembrandt is simple. Kindly reply to this message with an attachment of a photo of your progress by 31st August 2014 (Sunday).

Also, in your message, do fill out this form and send it along. I am well aware of Agent 007’s certain agents’ legendary lack of response when it comes to paperwork, but I do hope that for Q Branch’s sake, you new recruits will take the time to fill this out:
Artist name:
Progress: 
(e.g.80%)
Are you confident that you will be able to finish this?:
Additional comments:
That is all for now, I will be in touch again during the next check point.
[This message will now self-destruct in 3… 2… 1…]
01000111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01100100 01100001 01101101 01101101 01101001 01110100 00100000 01010011 01101001 01101100 01110110 01100001 00100001 00100000 01001000 01101111 01110111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01001000 01100101 01101100 01101100 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100100 00100000 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101110 01100001 01100111 01100101 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01101001 01101110 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01110011 01111001 01110011 01110100 01100101 01101101 00111111 00111111
abstract class Message {
  public          String name;
  // Methods
  public          void   explode();
  public virtual  void   notexplode();
  public          void   go();
//Override accepted//
— 
Your friendly neighbourhood 00Q Reverse Bang mod

So excited!

(Source: fairweatherfrey)

I’ve never been so pleased to see a meringue swan decapitated in my life!

(Source: sonictoaster, via wyomingnot)

wow247:

Layer Cake turns ten today!
Here are 10 amazing things about the movie


He’s the opposite of James Bond, isn’t he?  He plays coy the hole while and Bond almost interrupts peop—“MY NAME IS BOND.  JAMES BOND.”

wow247:

Layer Cake turns ten today!

Here are 10 amazing things about the movie

He’s the opposite of James Bond, isn’t he? He plays coy the hole while and Bond almost interrupts peop—“MY NAME IS BOND. JAMES BOND.”

(via tomhardyschef)

These memories are all I have.
Lilting | Hong Khaou, 2014

(Source: entertainingtheidea)

jonimitzer:

grimdarkthroes:

you know whatd be a fun exercise

get a writer and an artist together. artist does a sketch, writer writes a handful of paragraphs. they give them to each other.

writer has to write a handful of paragraphs on the scene depicted in the sketch, and it cant be just like, describing it. artist has to draw a new sketch from the writing.

it’d be a neat lil’ flex-the-muscles sort of thing. 

What the heck, I LOVE this. I’d do this in a heartbeat! Does this interest people? (Artists, specifically. I can’t draw/paint/anything.)

…so a Big Bang?

(which reminds me—was there anything more about that 00Q reverse bang?)

(via qtmaster)